That's when I realized, this is not a hearing/listening issue. It's actually a caring issue. Caring about what I was asking him to do.
TIPS TO HELP GET KIDS TO CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE SAYING
1. CONNECT first with the child or teen. Get on the same wavelength and plug-in to what they are doing and feeling. Try doing an activity together or start up a conversation about one of their favorite topics. This really gets their attention and sets up for a more positive discussion.
These are some key ways to help children and teens to do what is expected of them. Yelling at them or using threats can usually get some movement or action from them in the short-term but does not address what is really going on.... the lack of care around what you are asking them. This doesn't mean that they don't care about YOU, it's just that what you want and what they want in that moment can be very, very different. Acknowledging this aspect of the situation and then finding an alternative to yelling, screaming, begging or threatening can not only benefit your needs and the child's needs. It can also have positive long-term benefits on the relationship and emotional well-being.