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DECODING TANTRUMS: for toddlers & young children - Tantrum Response PART 2/2

11/22/2013

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This is the continuation of Part 1 "Tantrum Prevention". To read this part first or to review click here >>>>>

PART 2.) TANTRUM RESPONSE
If tantrums have hit, it can seem nearly impossible to deal with it. Here is a 'tantrum tolerance technique' that can help you stay cool and confident.

These are the 3 key points to remember

    A.) Stay Safe - ensure your child stays safe as much as possible. Sometimes tantrums can be full-blown and the child can get physical. Only move your child to a safer place if necessary and their health & safety are at risk. Otherwise, try not to physically touch a child during a tantrum, they are in an 'emotional state of mind', not a logical one.

    B.) Stay Neutral - This is a critical step in the process as your child will be watching your every move during this time to see how you react to determine how they are going to feel and react. This is where their learning will happen. As tempting as it might be to blow your lid as well, stay neutral and carry on with something else like finishing up dinner for example. Try not to discuss anything or ask any questions and engage your child. Choose 1 phrase to say if needed such as 'first dinner, then dessert' and repeat if necessary. This will show your child that you are firm, cool and in control which will be more effective then engaging in the drama.

    C.) Stay Nearby - Your child's tantrum may send you running for the hills but when they are in this very 'insecure' moment, they need to know that you are going to be there for them. This doesn't mean getting involved in the upset or try to smother them in affection but rather stay in eye or ear-shot so they know you haven't abandoned them. Realize that tantrums are a necessary part of development, it is an expression of emotion. Help teach children the skills required and then assist as needed.

The purpose of all of these points is to bring light & awareness to why tantrums are happening. De-coding tantrums into these 2 groups helps Parents to understand more which can bring greater effectiveness and confidence.

Click here to read PART 1 of Decoding Tantrums >>>>>
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Contact or learn more about Julie Romanowski - Mother, Coach, Leader, Educator, Author, Speaker & founder of Miss Behaviour: parenting coach & consultant services.

www.missbehaviour.ca
778-996-6535
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DECODING TANTRUMS: for toddlers & young children - Tantrum Prevention PART 1/2

11/22/2013

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You can 'de-code' tantrums by sorting them into 2 separate groups. The first is 'TANTRUM PREVENTION' and the second is 'TANTRUM RESPONSE'.

PART 1. ) TANTRUM PREVENTION
Tantrum prevention is an important piece of the puzzle as this will be a 'proactive' approach which can help decrease tantrums tremendously if not stop them all together. It will be more effective in tackling tantrums versus not doing any prevention and be left dealing with them constantly which is a 'reactive' approach. 

   A.) Increase Sleep - 
One of the main issues behind behaviour in children is lack of adequate sleep. This is a huge issue for a lot of Parents who just seem to 'put up with it' because they don't know what else to do. Toddlers are needing about 12-14 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period for proper growth & development and to just function normally on a daily basis.. {Infants about 14-16 hours and preschoolers about 10-12 hours}. Ensure your child is getting enough sleep as this will help diminish tantrums and behaviours.

 B.) Increase Routine - 
You may have several routines already but if your little tot is misbehaving or having a lot of tantrums, they may not be effective enough. At this early age you can't have enough routines. Children but especially toddlers, thrive on structure and routine. Being able to 'predict' what is going to happen next is a critical component to a child's learning and understanding.

 C.) Increase Attention -
There is a good chance that even though you may be spending every waking minute ( and night time too) with your child, there may not be enough 'attention' in the 'tank'. This is your quality, one-on-one time that you spend with your child with no other distractions or items on the agenda accept for making a true connection. Many Parents admit that this is lacking on a daily basis because they just think they are with them all the time anyway, so what difference does it make. There is a huge difference when you 'top up the tank' of attention as this builds attachment, connection and trust. 

Click here to continue reading PART 2 of Decoding Tantrums >>>>>
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Contact or learn more about Julie Romanowski - Mother, Coach, Leader, Educator, Author, Speaker & founder of Miss Behaviour: parenting coach & consultant services.

www.missbehaviour.ca
778-996-6535
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